Anger and frustration

How can the whole world be right about me again?

Am I that obvious a person?

I use to think that nobody would ever be able to figure me out - it was my defence mechanism.

I always argued that I won't find love. I always argued that every person doesn't have that special somebody who will be able to stick through everything. I always argued that I won't get married. I always argued that I won't have children. It is safe to presume, I always argue - about everything.

Now that I have met you, I realise that every person in this life, has somebody who will handle everything thrown their way - my biggest fear now is doing something that will make you run. I am not an easy person to live with.

As we go through life, we get to know ourselves. I've learnt that my worst fear isn't spiders. My worst fear is going through this life, all alone. I've realised that I need somebody to be there with my every step. I've realised that I will need to get married one day.

After I realised this, I still continued to argue that I didn't want children - not the human type in any way.

I like to argue - it is what I do best. I am a cranky person - at least 3 days of every month. I am not an easy person to handle, yet you are excellent at it.

You made me realise that there is something like real love. You mad me realise that every girl does dream of her perfect wedding - in my case the perfect wedding ring. You made me realise that that there is a perfect husband for me - you. You also made me think about the pitter patter of little feet in our home one day - the human kind.

This feeling I have is strange - not in a bad way, just in an uncertain way. I've never felt it before, so I'm not quite sure what it is.

I've decided you are one of my kind. I've decided I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I've decided it's you that I want. I've decided I'm never letting you go.