Have you ever experienced a mixture of emotions so strong that it feels as if your heart wants to burst out and all you think about is ending your life and making the emotions go away. Life sound so much easier if I'm not in it!
Never drive when you are angry... I did!
When you see someone making the same mistakes as you and you see that they realise it, but they just continue with it - it boils the anger like never before. You are angry at the person for not listening. Then you get angry, because you made the same mistake. Then you get angry because they're making the mistake. And then the anger loses control when they just continue with the mistake they know they're making.
So I thought of all the places I can drive to, so I could end my life. Car accidents happen every day and it's easy to leave life that way.
When you're angry and you drive, you don't think rational.
And I realised something today. When I get angry, tears stream down my face and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. So I drove faster and cranked the music up louder. I almost drove into a wall when I reached 160km/h. Then I realised what the costs should be - in case I survive the accident. Then I realised what drama I might cause if I don't.
Being me is a huge pain in the ass! I wish with all my heart that I just never existed.
Life would be so much easier if I never happened!
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